When relationships go wrong, what do you do? You realize that they were meant to go wrong anyway
No relationships in this world is without problem or differences. We cannot live alone. We live in society with friends and families. Perhaps the reason that every human being is different than the other, that every person is unique is what makes life so interesting. But then, sometimes these differences can pose problems such as difference in opinions or different in judgments. It starts usually with a small disagreement and then it erupts into a rally of fights.
Well, first of all-you have to appreciate your relationship with your special someone just as a relationship. You have to remember that bonding is not cut off easily. Just as you have fights with your siblings, cousins and then it cools down and everything becomes ok similarly with your girlfriend/boyfriend/ life partner-things can go wrong and things can be cooled down again. Problem with people who have been into and out of too many relationships usually find it hard to gather that bonding. They feel they will lost or has lost a person with one fight (perhaps the memories of the other fights compel themto think this is it-it’s over). And then continuing in a long term relationship becomes hard.
Then again, if you’re with a person with whom you’re fighting everyday-there is almost nothing but hate between you both and all you both could wish for over a long time is to get away from each other or worse, begin to wish for the downfall or mishap of another-remember your’re NOT in love. You’re just carrying the burden of a relationship that was never there or has been dead for long and you’re not being able to bury the hatchet. If that’s the situation the best way to let it go. Instead of fighting with one another, it’s much better to peacefully call it off.
However that’s not really applicable to all couples except those who have really had it. For most, it is just natural that you will fight over one thing or another. If you did not-well-that would be very strange. Perhaps the very fact that your special someone may not be special in almost every case, or is acting/behaving the way you don’t want, or you’re not being able to adjust with that person makes it so tough to be together. The best way is to practice patience, put your differences aside and learn to accept what has come of it.
Well, first of all-you have to appreciate your relationship with your special someone just as a relationship. You have to remember that bonding is not cut off easily. Just as you have fights with your siblings, cousins and then it cools down and everything becomes ok similarly with your girlfriend/boyfriend/ life partner-things can go wrong and things can be cooled down again. Problem with people who have been into and out of too many relationships usually find it hard to gather that bonding. They feel they will lost or has lost a person with one fight (perhaps the memories of the other fights compel themto think this is it-it’s over). And then continuing in a long term relationship becomes hard.
Then again, if you’re with a person with whom you’re fighting everyday-there is almost nothing but hate between you both and all you both could wish for over a long time is to get away from each other or worse, begin to wish for the downfall or mishap of another-remember your’re NOT in love. You’re just carrying the burden of a relationship that was never there or has been dead for long and you’re not being able to bury the hatchet. If that’s the situation the best way to let it go. Instead of fighting with one another, it’s much better to peacefully call it off.
However that’s not really applicable to all couples except those who have really had it. For most, it is just natural that you will fight over one thing or another. If you did not-well-that would be very strange. Perhaps the very fact that your special someone may not be special in almost every case, or is acting/behaving the way you don’t want, or you’re not being able to adjust with that person makes it so tough to be together. The best way is to practice patience, put your differences aside and learn to accept what has come of it.
Every relationship works best when both side compromises. Like for example, you don’t like it too cold so you would want to be in a place with the AC turned off but your other half is feeling extremely nauseated and wants it on. Then you both can start to fight whether this should be on or off. This is just a laughable yet true example. Fights can start with things as simple as this. And this bunch of little little things can get way. The best way to overcome this is to learn to compromise. Compromise sometimes for yourself and sometimes for the other person. Of course your partner should also do the same.
When we choose someone in our life, we don’t tend to walk to each other. We are meant to walk together. That means we don’t really have to change each other or be someone who we are not. Sometimes trouble arises because we fail to notice this line. We are just meant to be who we are and meant to go along for our life together. Sometimes we compromise so much that we change and we don’t realize who we are anymore or what we want. And then slowly, subtly, problems began to arise. We are not happy or peaceful. We find a storm in our hearts and we blame that personfor being the cause of it (although sometimes it even happens too that the other person never wanted you to change but you do to carry on, with a better result-but what comes after is nothing better but only worse). When you compromise from being who you really are, your own nature is bound to hit you sooner or later and that means your own desires, your own choices gets buried somewhere deep inside and one day when you want them back-you find yourself confined in a perfect world as somebody else. That’s when things go really bad and almost out of hand. Best way is trying to avoid major changes in yourself. Compromise but also know the limits of compromising.
When we choose someone in our life, we don’t tend to walk to each other. We are meant to walk together. That means we don’t really have to change each other or be someone who we are not. Sometimes trouble arises because we fail to notice this line. We are just meant to be who we are and meant to go along for our life together. Sometimes we compromise so much that we change and we don’t realize who we are anymore or what we want. And then slowly, subtly, problems began to arise. We are not happy or peaceful. We find a storm in our hearts and we blame that personfor being the cause of it (although sometimes it even happens too that the other person never wanted you to change but you do to carry on, with a better result-but what comes after is nothing better but only worse). When you compromise from being who you really are, your own nature is bound to hit you sooner or later and that means your own desires, your own choices gets buried somewhere deep inside and one day when you want them back-you find yourself confined in a perfect world as somebody else. That’s when things go really bad and almost out of hand. Best way is trying to avoid major changes in yourself. Compromise but also know the limits of compromising.
